It all started with my dad.
My parents are both in their 70s. They don't speak English. Between six siblings, we coordinate their care as best we can — appointments, results, medications, follow-ups. My sister and I carry most of their medical history in our heads.
A few months ago, my dad received a diagnosis that we should have caught much sooner. The MRI had been done. The information existed somewhere. But between the hospital, the family doctor, and a family with no shared system for any of it — it got lost.
I was overcome with guilt. I wondered: if we had kept a log of what had been ordered and what had come back, if we had known to ask the right questions — would we have caught this earlier?
I believe the answer is yes.
I started building care with me because this is a solvable problem. Research shows that millions of caregivers across Canada are navigating the same fragmentation, often with less support and higher stakes. I cannot unsee this gap — the way caregivers are left to figure it all out for themselves, at the expense of their own and their loved ones' wellbeing.
Mursal Ashrafi is a researcher, designer, and engineer based in Toronto. Her background spans systems thinking, EDI, and community-based research.
If you've been through something similar with your own loved ones and want to contribute to making care with me real, please share your experience with us below.